This is what I get for trusting the product and taking any updates...
Shipping a feature incomplete beta as an official update is unacceptable. They obviously knew what they were doing, since Evernote Legacy is a thing. I'm glad it's there, I installed it right away, but it seems like they're just gauging interest for the missing features by seeing how angry the userbase would get. Those tactics are common in free software, but they're not acceptable on a paid service.
Internal Links don't work with Evernote Legacy, so even if I stay there, I'm losing features...
I've been a Premium user for 7 or so years and this is the first time I'm actively looking at alternative services to migrate to.